Here’s an interesting article from the Guardian about the argument for and against teaching happiness lessons in schools.

You can see why Anthony Seldon, head of Wellington College (one of the most elite schools in the UK) is so keen that kids get something more than the National Curriculum, since it will hardly prepare them for the adult world in the 21st Century after all. But teaching them Positive Psychology doesn’t fill Richard Schoch with confidence, largely because he says you can’t measure meaning and engagement, which are the holy grail of happiness. He thinks there is a place for well-being in the classroom, but doesn’t really have any suggestions about how to teach it, other than getting kids to read ancient texts.

Hmmmmm.

I’m not sure that’s the answer either!

The really interesting question is why we feel that children need to be taught about happiness in the first place. Some people (including Seldon) have argued that kids are more prone to depression, anxiety and other mental illnesses than in the past. So teaching them various life skills will help them survive these issues. If that’s the case, shouldn’t we be asking ourselves what is causing them to be more prone to depression, anxiety and other mental illnesses in the first place, and try to do something to fix that?

According to Schoch, Positive Psychology is a bit like Marmite, i.e. you either love it or you hate it. The challenge for Positive Psychologists is how to persuade its critics that it’s a useful subject which can make a positive difference to how people choose to live their lives. I’m not sure it’s succeeding in that aim at the moment. What do you think?

You can read the original debate between Seldon and sociologist Frank Furedi here.

As we mentioned in this post, it seems that Seligman’s 3 pillars of happiness and well-being (positive emotion, engagement and meaning) may soon be joined by two more, namely positive relationships and positive achievement.

I doubt many would argue about positive relationships being a corner-stone of happiness and well-being, although you might be interested to know that there is remarkably little published scientific research into this field. But the importance of positive achievements seems to have people divided.

In the business world, goal-setting has been the back-bone (along with a smidgen of good luck) of company and personal prosperity since the dawn of time. Call it strategy, business planning or personal development planning, it’s all about creating a new, more successful future. To some, particularly coaches, goal-setting and accomplishment is vital, it’s what successful coaching is all about. When we were training as coaches, one of the first things we learnt was how to help clients (or coachees) define where they want to be by setting their goals clearly and then to help them achieve these goals. After all, how can you get where you want to go unless you know where you’re going in the first place?

Goal-setting is also making its way into normal life; you will no doubt have noticed yourself the proliferation of books and articles about so-called Life Lists, those 101-things-you-must-do/see/experience- before-you-die type lists. Earlier in the year for example, the New York Times published an article called 10 Things To Do Before I Finish This Article. If you google ‘Life Lists’, you’ll retrieve millions of entries, such as the original 43things.com, which invites you to publish your own Life List and which contains everything from the quirky (“build a trebuchet”) to the frankly quite dull (“organise my filing cabinet”). You can get Life List websites which list the things you need to consider when making your list. Curiously, in my google search for UK Life Lists, three of the top ten were by bird-watchers; it left me wondering whether twitchers are happier than your average UK resident. Perhaps that could be the subject of my MAPP dissertation…..

There are even people who make their living out of their Life List, such as John Goddard, aka ‘The World’s Greatest Goal Achiever’. This is a man who has achieved 109 of his 127 life goals (you should look at them, this is not a man who needs to organise his filing cabinet…). Interestingly, his 126th goal was to marry and have children – he now has five. My question is, how on earth does he get time for them, in between scaling Mount Kilimanjaro, retracing the steps of Marco Polo and Alexander the Great, and exploring the Amazon river?

And going back to coaching for a moment, Caroline Adams-Miller, the well-known US life coach, author and Pennsylvania MAPP graduate, specialises in goal-setting theory and happiness in her coaching practice, based on the research evidence that identifying and achieving ones goals can increase your well-being (e.g. Locke 2005). Miller has also set up a very successful website where people can make a public statement about their goals, called Your100things.com.

But Life Lists don’t attract support from every quarter; there are some who think that making a list of what you want to achieve in life actually detracts from what life is all about, i.e. living. I don’t often listen to BBC Radio 4’s Thought for the Day on the Today programme, but this one by Rhidian Brook about Life Lists caught my attention, particularly Brook’s claim that “They provide us with a kind of short cut to meaningful achievement and self-fulfilment”. I’m not sure that’s the case at all. Surely it depends to a large extent what your goals are (materialistic? altruistic?), whether they are realistic goals or just wild dreams, and how relentlessly you pursue them. Many Life Lists I’ve looked at contain a mix of goals which cover all Seligman’s pillars of well-being (creating pleasure, engagement, meaning and good relationships).

And anyway, who is it who said that ‘Life is what happens to you while you’re making other plans’?

Yesterday I was fortunate enough to attend a Performance Coaching Masterclass with Myles Downey, organised by the Academy of Executive Coaching in London. Downey founded the School of Coaching in 1997 and has recently acquired 100% ownership. His book, Effective Coaching: Lessons from the Coach’s Coach, has been in my Top 3 since I started coaching and has been a crucial influence on my own approach ; in it he presents a compelling argument for non-directive coaching, in which the key role of the coach is to facilitate the coachee’s (or client’s or player’s)

1) awareness, through actively noticing, and
2) responsibility, by allowing them to actively follow their own interest, make their own choices and decisions.

Awareness and responsibility are essential components of engagement and developing intrinsic motivation, and are therefore crucial to coaching effectiveness and success. Anyone working in business change management and transformation knows that change cannot occur effectively without them.

At the Masterclass, Downey performed two demonstrations, one in which he coached someone to catch a tennis ball one-handed. ‘What’s that got to do with business coaching?’ you might ask. Well, it was a visible and powerful demonstration of what sports psychologist and coach Tim Gallwey referred to as The Inner Game, which is simply

Potential – Interference = Performance.

By getting the coachee to notice and focus their attention on the ball and how it is in flight, interference (in the form of fear, doubt, lack of confidence about ability etc) is removed and the coachee enters a flow state, in which they are more creative, insightful, relaxed, intuitive and objective. Rather than worry about dropping the ball and trying too hard to catch it, the coachee’s focus is temporarily placed outside themselves, resulting in visibly improved performance.

With his emphasis on strengths and developing potential I would describe Downey as a true Positive Psychology coach. If you want to understand more about the role of Positive Psychology in coaching read Effective Coaching ; just be aware that the book was first published in 1999, before the term ‘Positive Psychology’ really came into regular use. Your coaching practice will be re-energised as a result.

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi , founder of the flow concept, is the Positive Psychologist with the most unpronounceable name. Take a look at this… shows we’re not the only ones struggling with it.

BTW I’m reliably informed you say ‘cheek-sent-me-high’. Our PP class, however, prefers to call him “Mike”…

Stefan Sagmeister, Austrian-born graphic designer, shares his thoughts on the subjects of design and happiness . His insights are very personal (such as his list of breathtaking moments), however, there are many themes here which everyone can relate to – such as doing work which really matters to you, being able to immerse yourself in work without being interrupted and enjoying the end results of a completed project.

Please do watch this clip, it’s only 15 minutes long, and contains some fascinating insight into the theory and practice of happiness. Plus it’s always inspiring to hear someone talk with passion and humour about their work.

Any well-being practitioners or academics reading will instantly spot that what Sagmeister talks about supports theories like self-determination , intrinsic motivation , flow ,competence, autonomy, relatedness and so on.

I liked his lists too, there were some real snippets of wisdom in ‘Things I have learned in my life so far’. In fact he has used some of them in his designs, for example, Being Not Truthful Works Against Me and Complaining is Silly: Either Act or Forget. I’ll summarise them for you in a future post.

Thanks to Neil for sending this clip to me.